Weekly Challenge: Go out and have a Rogerian Argument.

Whatever Happened to Rogerian Argument? » CounterPunch: Tells the Facts, Names the Names



This is a very good article that discusses the idea of my blog. I didn't know that the new style of communication that I had stumbled upon had a name. I guess that I have unknowingly become a fan of the Rogerian argument. I like it. The conventional Aristotelian argument, I win or you win, sets us up in a false dichotomy and polarized thinking, that either one is right or the other. Black or white. Democrat or Republican. Right or wrong. Good or bad. Too many in the list or not enough. Funny or not.



We teach in the LDS church that the truth is circumscribed into one whole, which can be interpreted that we can't pull one truth out and observe life from only that perspective. Truth must be acknowledged from every angle. Thus by following the Rogerian Argument, or in my words, being willing to be wrong and to acknowledge things as they really are, we can learn the truth through crucial conversations.



David, my younger brother, and I are pretty good at holding these kinds of discussions. Last night, as we waited for the moon to turn red, we talked for hours on controversial subjects such as welfare and the abolition of bi-partisan systems. We viewed the pros and the cons together. We had differing opinions, but we asked questions and proposed "what-ifs" to help us understand each others point of view. I found it rather enjoyable.



So today, I offer a challenge. A commitment, if you will. Go out and have a Rogerian argument sometime this week. It doesn't have to be over something huge like abortion, but it could be if you are that brave to start there. My prediction and experience is that you will find that the emotions will not be as high and that the subjects will not be quite as controversial as we build them up to be. However, both sides have to participate in this style of thinking, or it will not work.



Remember. Restate the other person's point of view until they are satisfied that you understand them. Then, and only then, bring up new evidences or logic trains to help them see what you see. If emotions get high, pause and discuss which comments raised the emotions and what each person wants and doesn't want from the conversation. Then re-engage.



Will you do it? Are you scared? Take a step outside of your comfort zone and see if it changes your life for the better.